I write, read and review, I blog frequently and love anything to do with books and writing, including editing. I am a Book Nerd and I wear that badge with pride. http://coffee2words.wordpress.com
This has some good potential, but is seriously lacking in substance. The groundwork for the plot and outcome are there, but it is like being shown a child's picture book. The scenes lack any sort of dimension, save for a few sentences (the forest floor/damp leaves) which show me that M. J. can create good description.
A firm handed editor is also needed. There are a lot of simply fixed issues with choice of wording, missing punctuation and incorrect spelling.
The sexy scenes were not the best. A lot of grunting and thrusting (a bit too basic) and not enough detail.
Good start M. J. Keep at it and it will get better.